The Toyota Hilux and Why it’s The Truck WE ALL NEED!

Greetings Me Droogs N Droogettes!
So went over to twatter today, and my feed came up with this:

Below that followed a short video of just why the Toyota Hilux is such a badass vehicle:

About that…


Except here in the Untied Staatz.
My response was to whip up a quick Meme per my usual:

As they say, “Testify Brothers and Sisters!!!”

Absolutely spot-the-fuck-on amiright?

Now, IRL it’s supposedly because of safety and ‘reasons’
To me it’s just the typical DotGov overreach. Lord know we have enough of that, and that’s a major reason for our imminent collapse.

Supposedly the comparable vehicle in the Toyota Lineup that is available in the US is the Tacoma. Myself, I have a hard time believing the claims of it being ‘comparable’.

But that’s like just my opinion man.

The tariffs and bullshit that were established back in the day, ESPECIALLY the “Chicken Tax” Per wiki: “This was a 25% tariff on light trucks that the US government imposed in 1964 in response to tariffs on US chicken imports from France and West Germany. The tax is named after the European nations that imposed the tariffs, which are a relic of post-World War II mercantilism. At the time, cheap American chickens drove down poultry prices abroad, so European nations created chicken price controls to protect their own industry.”

So because we wanted to fuck with the Euro-nations because they didn’t want to allow us to fuck over their farmers, we started taxing the fuck out of light trucks.

Which fucked both us, the consumers, and them, the sellers of some really awesome rides. Is there anything that a politician can not fuck up???

So, besides not allowing us to get our greedy paws on the Hilux, we were, and are still currently denied access to the Land Rover series of vehicles. We can get those shitty highly overpriced RANGE Rovers, but eh real deal? Notsomucho. In Fact, the best example of one of them being the 1961-64 Series II 88 variant:

Most memorable from appearing in films like “The Gods Must Be Crazy” and “The Final Option” as well as any 1980s British military oriented action movie, as the BritDotMil used the Land Rover as it’s HMMWV back in the day:

That’s the DotMil Land Rover “Defender”
Still in use today…

Now, there are some out there that are for sale here in the States, but God Help You IF you get one of the ones that’s not on the “LIST”. I remember there was a wee bit of a scandal back a few years ago where a dealer had imported a bunch of them that were not approved by “Uncle Sugar” and subsequently, despite having shelled out upwards of $40k to $50k for the vehicles each, our Beneficent and Munificent DotGov (sarc) confiscated all of said trucks, and ran them through a crusher, with zero compensation for the poor fuckers who got conned and fucked over.

Any wonder why people are wanting to make Tar and Feathering Great Again?

Except in these particular cases, instead of the tar being slightly warmed so as to make it inconvenient and uncomfortable for the target of our ire, I recommend that in the future, we “go full retard” and get that shit up to “Molten Lava Boiling” levels right before the application to the bureaucrat responsible in question.

As they would have said, this will result in a

Of course the tar-in-question back then was pine tar which was used to waterproof ships and whatnot. It wasn’t meant to be fatal… in fact according to my research, there are no known fatalities from ‘T&F’ing’ during the American Revolution.

The tar I think we need to use, should the occasion arise is asphalt tar. No surviving that shit as far as I know. Sapper occasionally gets a asphalt barge that comes in, and he purely hates dealing with it, as it’s waaay hotter, far more dangerous, and the occasion of it happens, and it has, when it splashes or spills during the sampling phase, the shit burns right through his protective gear.

So now… I’d keep going in this vein of anti-social verbal abuse, but Gretchen is calling on me from the bedroom to spend “quality time:” with her, whatever that means… like we’re not already joined at the hip? I think she wants to watch some Vids or something…
Le Sigh…

So More Later
Big Country

36 thoughts on “The Toyota Hilux and Why it’s The Truck WE ALL NEED!”

  1. I suggest pitchcapping instead of tar and feathering. Its so humane that the English would use it against the Irish.

  2. Going to guess we’ll be seeing some hilux on the move in Iran, now that it sounds like the President and his entourage are crispy critters in the aftermath of the crash of the helicopter carrying them, based on late reports. That’s sure to add another layer of instability and fun in the sandbox. If there is even a suspicion Israel had a hand in it, that’s very likely to be a code brown moment.

    How many more fuckups can possibly be tossed into the mix before we see a no-shit big time war get started?

    Bet they’ve got some hiluxes over in the DRC too, where an apparent coup – supposedly involving western actors, including one American now in custody – was put down. A whole shit pot full of geopolitical instability is cropping up now, and I gotta be honest: it’s looking really bad.

  3. Even back in the days of real T&Fing, for just the idjits that pissed the community off was cold tarring, which wasn’t painful. For real assholes was hot-tarring (really warm tarring) and that would peel off layers of skin if one was unfortunate, along with the blisters and associated heat trauma.

    Right now, cold tarring and covering with steel wool and setting the wool on fire sounds about right for so many politicians and bureaucrats. Or pouring burning hot sand on them (which is what, besides hot boiling sewage, was what was really used in siege battles) on the mother fuckers.

    As to the Hilux, yeah, thanks Big Government. Same with the Kei vehicles, those cute compact sedans, vans and pickup trucks powered by oversized motorcycle engines. Totally not meeting the safety standards, but totally nice vehicles for city driving or for farm use. A Kei pickup is like an oversized side-by-side ATV, but with far more payload and potential. And they get as good or better MPG than hybrids. But because not safe for California we can’t have them unless we buy 25 year old or older vehicles through specific importers. The same importers that can import 25 year old or older Hiluxes because antiques and crap.

    Fuck. If we survive this coming storm, I’d say one of the things we need to really kill over is government overreach in vehicles.

    1. In your comment:

      “…I’d say one of the things we need to really kill over is government overreach in vehicles.”,

      I think a more general approach is appropriate, like:

      “…I’d say one of the things we need to really kill is government overreach.”.

      And if necessary, remove the ‘overreach’ stipulation. Just kill government. Apparently it’s like Kudzu – you can try pruning it, but it keeps growing back 10x larger unless you burn it out at the root. :-/

  4. Hiluxes are shit – until recently could only legally tow 1200kg, and the CV joints are like chewing gum. The new ones these days are better but the Ford Ranger eats them alive in every category.

    You want a Man’s 4WD – a 79 series Toyota Landcruiser Troop Carrier with the V8 turbo diesel. The dual cab Ute version of the 79 series is equally good.

    The Landrover defender is excellent (ie aluminium body for beach driving) but have shitloads of niggling issues like oil seals leaking etc etc etc. Great truck though, especially the long wheel base dual cab Ute 130. Better still have almost zero computers and safety BS. A truck built to last.

  5. The Tacoma is weak, nice enough as a cruiser, but weak. You can’t move it ten feet without an upshift, and the sedan engine is exactly that. Build quality is mediocre from Mex. Above commenters on better options, but not new ones.

    1. You don’t know shit. I have a 2009 with 430 000 km. And only done brakes twice and an alternator. My 1998 tacoma was a beast that’s pulled out every American made truck including a skid steer. They are bullet proof.

  6. On the Toyota thing….they will never build them like the 79 to 85 model pickups. I had an 81 I built when I was a pup, had 39.5 super swampers, 5.71 gears, and would root. Sunk her in a cypress pond during a bachelor party. Floated my liquor bottle out the the door. Pulled it out, drained the oil, set the oil filter on a stump, took out the spark plugs and took a wrench to turn the motor over to get the water off the pistons, dried out the distributor, replaced oil and filter (same one), and off we went for the rest of the weekend. There wasn’t hardly a mud hole in my part of florida I didn’t conquest or at least tried. Never broke anything and only ever had to change a clutch or two some bearings and that was about it. Absolutely the finest and most durable trucks ever made and would walk the dog on a big truck. You go to spinning 40″ swampers in 3rd low or 1st high and you are going places baby.

    1. I’ve got an ’86 1 ton, long bed Toyota, it’s the same as ’85 and older. I got it used, I’ve been abusing it for almost 20 years now. Inching up on 300k, if ya replace stuff as necessary, they go forever.

      1. (perhaps) not surprisingly, most well made machines are like this – as long as you can get or fabricate the necessary parts. And for far too many late-model vehicles (i.e. – the too complicated and/or designed to be replaced when broken/worn-out), that’s just not an option because they just don’t stock parts beyond a few years. Used parts work, when you can find ’em, but even that can be a crap-shoot. The trend to just ‘scrap/recycle’ older vehicles is drying up the used parts market. Soon the days of going to the ‘used parts lot’ (some place with dozens to hundreds or more of old vehicles to scavenge parts from) will be gone. In many places, it already is. 😥

  7. I always wondered about using that spray foam “great stuff” type sealer. That and a bat of pink fiberglass insulation and we could make Brazilian wax cotton candy examples out of slow, but still redeemable learners.

  8. What’s that HiLux in the vidya? a 1995 or so? Identical to the truck I had as a service tech back then.

    I was behind one in Mexico a month ago. Indistinguishable from a tacoma. Only the badge was different. IT didn’t have a badge like HiLux or Tacoma.

    It’s the same truck. I’m sure different motors are offered, like a diesel, and manual trannies are more popular. Probably airbags are an option as well, instead of mandatory. But – same truck. They don’t have separate platforms for the US. Only the options and badging change.

    1. screwed up where I added to my content – their trucks back in the day didn’t have names in the US. That wasn’t until decades later.

  9. Most people don’t understand that tariffs are a tax on the people. When tariffs are put in place the local price goes up.

    Example remember when lumber prices went through the roof, well trump I think it was put tariffs on Canadian lumber which was cheaper here in the ole fusa .

    Lumber lobbyists did a good job for them just like the steel lobbyists have done to protect domestic producers. Then add in Fed printing inflation and voila

    1. Most people don’t know that the Smoot–Hawley Tariff Act of 1930 was a MAJOR cause of the Great Depression.
      As soon as the US imposed all of these tariffs, other countries of course responded. This led to a MASSIVE rise in prices and companies started laying off which led to the economy getting worse, so they laid off some more, rinse and repeat until many filed bankruptcy.

      Tariffs should be used sparingly and only if a country is dumping cheap stuff into your country and destroying your local producers. Once the dumping stops then remove the tariff. Beyond that, it is just protectionism.

  10. Dude! I would never have thought it of you of all people. I never thought the jooz (or sandniggers- another of my posts you deleted) were protected here. You deleted my post called that them hebes and said something nasty about those who may not be named? Day-um.

    Well, I respect that youve outright deleted a couple of my posts that didnt fit your narrow.ative. I have had a couple of sites actually edit my posts to make it sound like I said something else. (coughwirecuttercough). Fucking Impotent Cowards- I guess mommy didnt let him suckle enough. Probably passed him off to Daddy to handle the job.

    Oh well, your house, your rules. Its been fun. Holler the next time you hold a OMGfundraiser. Ones about due unless I miss my guess.
    (btw, no need to rant at me in a post as i wont be here. and unlike most folks, i do mean that.)

    1. “Oh well, your house, your rules.”
      Should have kept it at that… instead you showed your ass.
      I know Don’t feed the trolls… BUT… This (?) comes in, throws poo and personal attacks around, and gets butthurt when called on it. Boo f-in’ Hoo…
      Tell me, did you come back to read this… punk. Troll, gonna troll, and they can’t stand no attention. He’ll be back, But can’t say anything ’cause he “promised”.
      Some peoples parents need to be slapped.
      Sorry BCE, Don’t want to make a mess, just in an intolerant mood right now. delete if I’m out of line.

      1. What gets me is WHAT THE HELL is guy talking about!?! I hardly EVER moderate -away- any comments UNLESS they’re personally aimed attacks on my fam or kids, OR FedPoasting? Maybe dood is on the wrong page?

        1. Don’t know why I thought I needed to defend, But Dammit, poo flinging chimps need to be dealt with.
          I know you are fully capable of handling chimps, thought I’d lend some backup.
          Your Blog…

  11. People ask why I drive a Japanese truck.
    Because the Germans don’t make them.

    1. I have to admit that I love my Honda Ridgeline.
      Now I live in the suburbs and never have to haul anything heavy, so a smaller pickup is perfect for me.
      In my opinion you can’t go wrong with a Honda Ridgeline or a Toyota Tacoma.
      Ford, Chevy and Dodge all are more expensive and have let their quality go to crap sadly.

      1. Sorry Jimmy…driving a Honda Ridgeline is like getting head from a dude.
        Feels great until you look down and realize that you’re gay.

        1. My father in law has a Tacoma and loves it. The problem is the head room.
          I’m built like BCE and over 6 feet tall and I NEED head room and the Ridgeline has plenty and I didn’t want a full size truck like an F150. Plus when tailgating, the Ridgeline has a power plug, speakers and a nice under the bed trunk that you can fill with ice and put drinks in.
          It may not be the “manly man’s truck”, but I really like it. 🙂

          1. I wanted a Taco too; but same deal-headroom. And occasionally pulling a horse trailer…went with the Tundra instead. 7 years and 100k later and I’m still happy

  12. Oof, I feel for Sapper. I did 90 days on an asphalt carrier once. 90 days of 360-degree oil, heating up the decks, radiating out along with the volcanic thermal oil heater, which was almost the same size as the ship’s 13,000hp main engine. It was fun, having to carry squares of plywood around to stand on, because you had to run from place to place on deck and never stop, as even fireman’s boots won’t stand up to the heat and start to melt after 20 seconds contact time, so if you had to swing a valve, God help you if you touched anything with bare skin. What really sucks is you can’t wear one of those Baked Potato silver foil approach suits, as they retain heat over time, and lose it too slowly once gained.
    I can’t blame Sapper for hating asphalt barges. My company asked me to take their first asphalt barge out from the builder because there was me and one other guy in the company with asphalt experience. I told them I would quit on the spot if they tried. The other guy just said no and put his notice in on the spot. Anyhow, 10/10, would recommend liquid asphalt for tarring and feathering and baking someone like a Hawaiian bakes a pig.

  13. I don’t know what, exactly, the HiLux has over the Tacomas, but in my sample of two, both are great veh. The 2000 pre-runner had 308k on it with no major, and few minor issues ever, before I passed it on to my nephew as his first veh. He drove it for a couple of years before he gout something else. My current 2010 Tacoma just turned 338k with no drive train issues, but a few annoying problems: The rear suspension was absolute shit. Replaced the rear leaf springs once under a TSB and again under a recall, and finally again with aftermarket springs on my own dime. I’m not using any oil during the 6k between oil changes and I’ve never changed the ATF. Even so, there’s no way it would hold up to the abuse they put that HiLux through.

  14. 1995 and earlier toyota pickups made in japan are all hiluxes with more safety features.

    All 4runners are japan made and more modern hilux equivalents, just w/o the truck bed.

    All landcruisers and lexus landcruiser rebadge models are also japan made and as or nearly so as robust as hiluxes.

    So there are available and affordable options in the states.

  15. I found two examples of the trucks that I said, “Ok, that I can work with.” Unfortunately, I cannot load the pics here. One is a Tacoma outfitted by “Polar expedition” whoever they are. The 2nd is a model I have never seen in the states before and is listed under something known as “The Zombie Squad.”
    I was never a truck guy, namely because it was 42 miles to work, one way and this is before I retired. Now I’m looking at them differently. I’ve been checking out a number of mid-70’s trucks and the amount people are getting for things in decent condition is anywhere from 15-30k. My mechanic at the local garage tells me that people are looking for post-apocalyptic vehicles.

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