Alive More Or Less (We Think)

Damn… That took a lot out of <us>…
Greetings and Yadda Yadda…

Do. not. get. that. Flu. or whatever the fuck that demonic motherfucker was/is. I got to feeling a wee bit better around last Thursday… I went to the Doc in the Box at the end of the street who Z-Packed me, and I went home…

Practically to Torches and Pitchforks as both Sapper and Gretchen were starting to experience the super-achy phase, and blamed me for bringing it home.

They both ended up going up to get the Z themselves, and that night, I got a full on relapse or something. Literally the bed soaked, alternating being feverish and then hotter than hell. Weak as a kitten too.

Essentially until yesterday/today, ALL of us were sloooowly dying in Bed. Even Sapper who never gets sick nor calls out. Guy normally is a fucking robot man. Terminator mode… but even this bug laid him low.

Z Pac and Prodigious amounts of Vitamin C Intra, a couple of IV bags and ‘stuff’ and man, a couple of days and I’m sorta-kinda back.

A quick fill in Story from back in the Days of the Army. I put this one up on the Reddit side of things… under “Worst/Funniest Moment in Basic”… as they say, this was mine:

“Puke in my D.I.s Face maybe?
Be Me. 1990… Ft Benning. Got served Brussel Sprouts on a field FTX (Infantry 11H). BOILED Brussel sprouts. Can’t stand the smell of them, get nauseated just because of the stench. Unfortunately, they forced the kid on the chow line on the BS Marmite to put them on my tray. Usually I went out of my way to avoid getting them on my tray ‘cos the ‘you take it/you eat it’ and there wasn’t any way I could… Now, I -tried- to skate… camo’d them fuckers so’s the D.I. at the garbage check wouldn’t see them… Unfortunately, I got caught and it went something like this:

D.I. Ingnorant : “Private BCE! What haven’t you eaten your delicious, nuuu-trious, government-approved Brussel Sprouts???!!!???”

Pvt BCE/Me: “I’m allergic to them Drill Sar’nt!!!!” (screamed at him full force, and I dunno if I am, it was all I could think of on-the-fly that might keep me from getting killed)

D.I. Ingnorant: (Steps forward, shouting) “That’s BULLSHIT! You will eat these greens, right here, and right now! No way on God’s Green Earth have -I- ever heard of an allergy to Brussel Sprouts… Now, open your fucking gob annnnd begin!!!”

Pvt BCE/Me: Opens mouth, starts chowing down… eyes begin to water… second Sprout goes in… > queue disturbing stomach noises <

D.I. Ingnorant: (Gets face-to-face w/me, diligently chewing and knowing what’s coming) “Now Pvt BCE, aren’t those just the best? Just like momma makes back home… swallow and tell me and all these other privates what you think of good ole US Army Hot Field Chow!”

Pvt BCE/Me: Swallows… starts trembling…eyes watering like I’d been CS’d… skin is now a gray-ish pallor according to witnesses later…

D.I. Ingnorant: “Well Pvt BCE?”

Pvt BCE/Me: Opens mouth, <HOOOORF!!!!!
Projectile vomits the -entirety- of my lunch alll over the D.I.’s chest…thick stinky barf… didn’t have enough loft to get him in the phizz… just enough to splatter the front of his BDUs with the half eaten remains of the Fried Chikin and Green Beans I -did- manage to scarf down…ran alllll the way down and dripped on to his spit shined Corcorans

Fucker got Forrest Whitter Eye at me, while I weakly lost my legs… went to my knees and said almost in a whisper… “I…tried… to… tell…. you… Drill….”

I passed out right after… between nerves and the whole situation, I was out for a few. After I found out D.I. Ingnorant got his ass handed to him by the First Shirt for ignoring that I had told him about an allergy. Still don’t know if I am per se, but it saved my ass… and NO I still cannot stand the smell sight nor taste of the dreaded Sprouts.

Didn’t get smoked, but hey… call it a win.”

So as they say, is that for Today. Maybe more tonight as I owe y’all. More Later

Big Country

11 thoughts on “Alive More Or Less (We Think)”

  1. Pardon my ignorance, but what is a Z-Pac ? Is it an antibiotic? Also is intravenous Vitamin C a common thing in the States or is it a military thing like Terrance Popp’s patented Ranger hang-over cure?

    1. Azithromycin… here in the States we call it a “Z Pack”
      Intravenous C unfortunately is NOT widely available, but I was able to find the compounding powder that you’d mix with distilled water to make an IV. In this case tho, we added it to a drink (1/2 teaspoon is enough for MAX dosing) and drank it down. Only issue is you have to brush the fuck out of the toofuses after as it’s a highly concentrated Citric ACID and can fuck up the fangs if you leave it on after

      1. This. This thing seems to be viral, but my wife got bronchitis out of it (she’s prone to it) and he sent her one, along with a shitload of prednisone (anti-inflammatory steroid). I haven’t been that beaten down with it — chicken soup and DM is doing the trick for me, and I’m almost over it. Couple of days of sore throat coughing and I’m on the upswing (God willing.)

        On the sprouts — when I was a kid, I was that way on all cruciferous shit. I could do cabbage, but broccoli, Brussel sprouts, cauliflower, all of it tasted like poison (roach spray, to be specific) and came right back up.

        Funny thing is I got married in my 30s, had regular fluid exchange in the marital bed, and found out that I actually could have broccoli with the missus now. I honestly think that there’s absolutely hormones and quite a bit more being passed back and forth, and now I can eat all of it. Funny thing is, cauliflower doesn’t taste like poison anymore, but I just plain don’t like it. Love broccoli and roasted sprouts now.

  2. Used to have the same response. Restaurant person gave me recipe. Fry pound of bacon crispy. Pull it out and crumble up. Cut brussels in half and fry in hot grease till edges browned/crispy. Toss with bag of parmesan and sweet chili sauce. I even got middle school nephews to gobble them up.

  3. Full respect BCE. I have still never eaten one and I’m grey in the beard.

    One time before I was about 10 my Da got sick of me leaving those foul feckin stink bombs on the plate. Said he said I couldn’t leave the table ‘till they were eaten.

    Couple of hours passed and I’m still there. He said I’d have them for supper.

    Couple of hours later he loses his shit and rubs my face in the plate and tells me to go out in the street like that. My Ma freaked out and I’m blubbering and blowing snot. That was the end of that.

    Still didn’t eat them. Don’t think badly of my Da – he was usually hard but fair. We’re both stubborn Mick’s that never back down but I won that one.


    1. Shit, sorry BCE – did I just shit on this thread . Childhood sucks if they’re doing it right

  4. I hate hate hate boiled brussel sprouts.
    However my wife gets fresh ones from produce department, cuts them in half, puts them on a bake sheet, throws seasoning on them and bakes them in the oven.
    They are actually pretty good that way.

    I hope and you, Wifey and Sapper are felling better soon. The flu sucks.

  5. Got an air fryer for X-mas. I do green bombers for the Pretty Wife in it. I cut into quarters, make a seasoning rub of bread crumbs, parmesean, black pepper, red pepper, oregano, basil, garlic powder. Sprinkle and toss liberally, throw in basket 380 degrees for 15 minutes. I eat a few, Pretty Wife finishes them. Now, I trim all the dead crap off the outsides and cut off the stem. Improves taste and smell a boat load. Adds to marital bliss.


  6. man i ain’t been sick since jan 2020 with the vid for a week…

    dec 1982 OSUT Ft Benning Harmony Church A-10-2 had spaghetti for lunch and a quick run back to platoon formation.. standing at attention right behind some black guy and up and out it came all over homeys back LOL.

    The guy couldn’t believe i did that and just froze up.
    drill made me hose em off right there and then LOL LOL

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