Greetings and Salutations!
Sorry (again) for being AWOL. It started last Monday, what with another issue w/Gretchen’s parents. We’ve now had to spend an enormous amount of time this week dealing with the issues.
One of which was getting the social worker(s) to get moar involved… so far it’s been sort of haphazard. So many things… Complaints about the free food deliveries from meals on wheels, of which I have not tried yet, but I’m going to, as -something- is off. I have my suspicions that Mom doeasn’t want anyone potentially assisting as it’s one of the small power plays she can make with Dad… and that in itself is the issue. She refuses to do the right thing, and keeps fucking up.
I’m not even going to go into the scam(s) but we’ve essentially found out b/c Mom almost fell for one of those telephonic scams the “…go get $600.00 in debit cards and say nothing to anyone!” seems they’re now on a list…
And since Mom’s oars don’t go alll the way in the water, whelp, again we had another close call.
And she utterly refuses to do anything to allow us to protect her. The social workers say that as of now they aren still legally ‘compos-mentis’ so we have to let them, specifically Mom, fuck up and ‘build book’ so as to make sure we have a solid case when it comes time to pack ’em off involuntarily…
So how’s your week been?
4? 5? days until something stupid happens it seems.
The sense of dread is palpable.
Tensions are high.
This past Sunday ‘Kentavious Gholston’ age 26 did the road-rage thing and murdered a 61 year old whyttedood. Seems Steven Powers, 61 honked at the aforementioned Australopithecine which caused him to chimp out.
This happened not even a mile and a half from the house.
Halloween here at the Casa was subdued. We did the candy thing, and had all of 12 kids… The Gran(s) both had a great time as well, and we got pics from the BabyDad… wish we could have been there but meh…
Now I have to work over the weekend to make up the lost hours from the idiocy of the In-Laws.
It is, what it is.
More Later
Big Country
Aw hell BC, the elderly parent thing can be a soul crusher. My grandparents on both sides had their issues, but they were all local and relatively close by geographically when there was a crisis. Paternal grandma and maternal grandpa both checked out fairly quickly and without much drama in the leadup to their passing, which is always a blessing.
The remaining grandma and pa had protracted health problems, but both kept kicking for a while. Grandpa needed more ongoing attention and intervention, as he insisted on staying in his own home, even when he was physically not really fit to continue doing so.
Grandma (mom’s side) was in a nursing home the last couple of years, which sucked, but at least she was supervised, and this was back in the early 2000’s before standard of care (and staff) got totally negrofied. She made 93. Grandpa on Dad’s side had kidney failure and made it over a year on dialysis, stayed in his own home the whole time, but got to be combative about getting any assistance, as his pride was too great.
I say all that to convey that I saw this stuff at close enough range back then (25 years ago now, more or less) that I can somewhat relate. My dad has been gone since 2001 (massive heart attack) so just have Mom to worry about now. She’s doing well at 75ish, and women in her family lineage tend to make lateish 80’s without much effort. But she will be the one I have to worry about at some point here. Luckily I have siblings who are local, and can step up. I have no inlaws, so have escaped that area if concern.
All of which makes it far easier than the situation you are dealing with. You have my sympathy for being put in a tough spot. It’s the distance and (mom’s) belligerence that are making it tougher for you, and while you have the ball rolling, sounds like there are still tough spots to be navigated.
Stay frosty man, good to see a heads up from you at least. After your last post, and then days of radio silence, I was beginning to wonder if shit went badly sideways.
As our parents age, it’s our duty to care for them as the they cared for us when we were young.
Albeit frustrating at times, gotta ignore/forget that selfish boomer bullshit.
In the same vane, WE need to set our selves up to make it easy for our kids to manage us as we get older.
I want the soft silky Depends not the discount variety!
Love your Blog!
Took the kids out trick or treating. The old neighborhood had already slowed to a fraction of the Halloween activity it had when I was a kid in the 80s and 90s. But even many of the regulars that participated every year were MIA.
I wonder what gives?
Dad suggested bags of candy being $20 might have something to do with it.
Use it as a learning experience to know what you must put in place for those around you when you get that adventure. Write it down now……. Wouldn’t it sometimes be nice if you had an instruction manual? The value of leaving one for those you leave behind is incredible. In my prayers as always.
a)
Old Folks.
Combative Denial.
.
I will engage with anybody attempting to dump my carcass in a rust-home [sic] to gradually wilt into the carpet.
.
.
b)
A slender 61yo Caucasian a) leaves his grandchild alone in his vehicle in traffic to b) ‘teach a lesson’ to the erratic driver, by happenstance, a massive homicidal racist.
Neither of those would be my first choice.
White neigborhoods around here mostly stopped trick-r-treatin’ 20 years ago because the nigs were coming in from the ghetto to git da good shit. They just started having Halloween/Fall festivals at the churches and such to avoid the groid. Nigs always have their paws out for free shit from whitey, it’s bred into ’em.
When my late Mom got hard-headed about something, I would tell her either the doctor or my brother said so. She’d do anything they “said”. My word wasn’t good enough. Hard-headed Irish lass.